There is a force within that gives you life—

            Seek that.

In your body there lies a priceless jewel—

            Seek that.

Oh, wandering Sufi.

            if you are in search of the greatest treasure,

            don’t look outside.

Look within, and seek That.

 

Should you be setting expectations for your spiritual life?  Shouldn’t you avoid plans that just manifest as desires, more wishes to cling to that can make you frustrated or unhappy?  Shouldn’t you just practice spiritually and let the rest take care of itself?  Shouldn’t you assume that the universe will take of you if you practice sincerely?

 

As soon as you begin “should-ing” yourself, you might notice that you’re already in trouble.  These “shoulds” are often the voice of your internal judge, your perfectionist, your parents, telling you what you ought to be doing, rather than your taking the time to look at your life and clarifying your spiritual practice for yourself.

 

Why are “expectations” unhelpful in spiritual practice?  Expectations can take you in the direction of being much attached to what you want in your life.  You might have a sense of entitlement about your being a spiritual person, since you are serious about your spiritual practice and there ought to be a payback for your hard work.  These types of expectations can often lead to misery, because if they don’t manifest precisely when you want them, exactly how you want them, you are likely to be disappointed.  For example, you may expect your life to be filled with equanimity, since you are a dedicated spiritual practitioner.  In fact, you’ve noticed that you don’t react as quickly or negatively to difficult situations if you practice regularly.  One day, however, someone really angers you, and you are responding in the “old ways”; all that hard work of prayer, meditation and lighting candles has been wasted!  To expect that your response to life will always be reasonable, calm and enlightened is unrealistic and a set-up for disillusionment.  From the Zen perspective of the absolute, your life is perfect just the way it is, even when you’re angry.  But that’s hard to remember when you’re miserable!

 

Instead of hard and fast expectations, I try to set aspirations.  One aspiration I have is to be a Zen teacher one day.  I am working steadily toward that goal, and I also have my disappointments and frustrations.  But my aspiration is consistent and I joyfully work toward it, as I notice that I am flummoxed by a koan one time, and see clearly into one another time.  There are certainly times when I am certain I’ve understood a koan and expect my teacher to accept my presentation, and I’m bewildered when she tells me “no”!  But I have those kinds of expectations many times per day.  One key to my spiritual practice is to “aspire” to not get stuck anywhere, although I expect it will happen from time to time!  And when I get stuck, even really stuck, I try to notice what’s occurring and either stay stuck for a while longer (when I’m really stubborn) or move on.

 

There isn’t anything wrong with expectations.  I have them all the time.  I’m even getting better at noticing when I have them and they’re not met.  Spirit gives me the freedom and insight to notice what’s going on at least some of the time; then I have choices about whether to hold to that expectation (because, after all, some expectations are fair and reasonable) or if the expectation is unreasonable or impossible, to simply feel my disappointment, let go of the expectation and move on.

 

So take a look at your expectations and aspirations.  Decide for yourself what is reasonable to expect, which expectations only cause you suffering, and then make a choice about whether you’d like to let those expectations go.  Then you can work more freely on your spiritual aspirations, whatever they may be.